The Curious Case of Percy Collins

Had a guy Percy Collins and his family giving them a ride to OAK If anyone was an expert at CP time it was them! For those unfamiliar with the term it stands for “colored people” time which is an adjective the describes black people’s stereotypical disregard for punctuality

15min it took them to get into the car! 10 min for them to bring out 3 suitcases another 5 for them to mosey on out to the car and then they pull out something from the trunk of their minivan. The daughter is dragging it with her back to me so I couldn’t see what she had. Turns out it was a foldable electric wheelchair!

Then my internal dialogue runs rabid “Maybe I should help her.” “Man fuck that bitch, they made me wait!” But emotion gives way to logic “Bro she could scratch the shit out of your car…” My baby! Immediately I’m out the car “Let me help you with that!” She swore up and down that it would fit in my trunk… It wouldn’t. She clearly did not want to squeezed in-between the scooter and her obese mother. She was. Funny how the universe has a way of working things out!

25 min later we are finally on the road. We go through the normal rigamarole about where they are flying to and what they do for work. Percy the patriarch was the most vocal. Got to telling me his name was Percy Collins and his son was also names Percy Collins Jr. When Jr had a son Percy Sr called and asked if he was going to carry on the naming tradition and his son responded with an emphatic NO! Percy said “See how bold he got over the phone!”

Now Percy was a retired shuttle driver from the veterans hospital. He said he had to retire because when he would show up to drop off a patient and the intake nurse would get confused as he couldn’t tell which one was the patient!

He would often drop off patients with dementia and find himself getting into arguments with the patients as they would believe that the cane he was walking with was there’s! I said you know it’s yours cause it had the initials PC for Percy Collins on it!

Hey if you can’t name the grandson at least you can name the cane!

Author: RideZilla

I drive for Uber and Lyft and created this site to log my experiences on the road

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