The Greatest Wedding Proposal That Could’ve Been Greater

This story is epic! It begins at Stanford University where I picked up Rashni. She told me an incredible story about how her husband Satish proposed to her.

Now they had been dating for about a year and a half when Satish suggested they take a road trip up to San Francisco. It was a perfect day, not a cloud in the sky.

On the 280 freeway he tells her he has to stop to take a leak. He gets off at the CA-1 headed toward Half Moon Bay. For those not from the Bay Area this road is a 14 mile bypass around a moutainous valley of sharp twists and turns, a minimum 30min drive. And that’s without traffic!

I imagine at some point Rashni had to have thought “My God this is quite a detour for a pee! I see plenty of bushes that could do the job.”

Satish said he’d found a hotel that surely had a restroom. He plugged in the directions, it was 3 miles away. As they drove they passed a McDonald’s, a Safeway and a host of other shops. Not to mention countless bushes and shrubs. Still Rashni was none the wiser.

She attributed the random route to Satish’s stubbornness. Once he made up his mind about something, there was no changing it.

Eventually, they got to the hotel. After Satish “relieves himself,” he suggests they walk around a bit as traffic would be bad at this time.

He takes her out to the balcony. A perfect view of the ocean. The sun is setting over Pillars Point leaving a beautiful amber hue as the backdrop. His timing was perfect!

Dropping to one knee he pops the question. “Rashni will you marry me?” Through a telescopic lens, Satish’s friend captures the entire event from an adjacent balcony.

I was so impressed by the level of detail he put into planning his proposal. I asked what was the ring like? She said “What ring?” Tires screeched as I slammed on the breaks. What?! HE HAD NO RING?!

Didn’t want to tip her off he says. BS… I say. The ring is one of the most critical components of the proposal! It’s the cherry on the sundae!

And every man who has proposed in the past has to figure out how to determine his future wife’s ring size without tipping her off.

You find a way.

You figure it out.

It’s part of the process!

Part of the fun!

If you can’t figure it out, you do something, anything, hell, even a ring pop will do! But in my opinion, what you don’t do is show up empty handed!

Dear Parking Lot Nazi…

To the self appointed Parking Lot Nazi at the Morgan Hill Safeway, who was so kind to leave me this note judging my character and my car, I say this: Get a life and some real problems! Take that energy and put it to good use like writing to your Congress about gun reform.

My car IS that nice… To me! And if I want to take up two spaces because you idiots don’t know how to open your car doors delicately to avoid putting dings on my car, what’s it to you?!

How’s this, trade in your piece of shit for a better whip, so you can be on the level. Cause if your car was better than mine you’d feel me on my parking strategy!

That being said, If you are going to leave a note on people’s cars like the douche bag you are, at least have the decency to do it with some class!

Remembering Puerto Rico

I just saw an article about Puerto Rico being opened back up for tourism https://www.prnewswire.com/news-releases/puerto-rico-declares-it-is-officially-open-for-tourism-300569867.html it reminded me of a ride I had recently with a relative of a family who was hit by hurricane Maria.

Evie from Puerto Rico has 2 Bros and a sis and 80 yr old mom. She is the only one currently living in the US. Her brother Jose lived in countryside. When the hurricane hit a flash floods hit his home. Within minutes water had reached 6ft in his house. As he ran out he remembered his elderly neighbor who lived next door. As he went over to get her their was about 1ft of air in house!

Back in the US, Evie was in agony as she was unable to reach her mom for 4 days! On the 4th day she got a call from her mom, but she was only able to talk to her for 30 seconds just enough to let her know she was alive and that she loved her. It wasn’t for another 10 days that she was able to talk to her brother and rest of the family.

In America we sit and observe the devastation in the comfort of our homes. Meanwhile, Evies family went 1 mth without running water 1.5 mths without electricity. Luckily they were prepared for such an event by having big drums of water saved for a rainy day no pun intended.

They had to improvise by plugging in a hose to the drum and syphoning water for washing clothes and bathing using a stove to heat water! Too often we ignore the suffering of other human beings when the suffering happens outside of our circumference.

Where was FEMA I asked? Well, countryside was hit the worst and thus needed the most attention.

Her mother lived in the city and although was hit by the storm didn’t suffer as much damage as the countryside. Still, imagine not having running water, electricity for more than a week. We take for granted the luxuries afforded to us. I’m glad things have improved in Puerto Rico and encourage everyone to plan a vacation out there to help pour money back into the country as I’m sure this storm has dealt a savage blow to thier economy!

What does that spell?!

Gave a ride to a drunk lady and her 10 yr old daughter coming back from a baby shower. Asked what she did for a living she said she was a broker. I said what kind of broker? Stocks? Insurance? She spelled HOOKER!

Now the interesting thing was not only did she have a 10 yr old daughter, she also had a 5yr old son and a husband! I wonder how that works?

Now remember her daughter was in the 4th grade I’m pretty sure she knew what HOOKER spelled!